What's your Attachment Style?
DISCOVERING YOUR ATTACHMENT STYLE IS IMPORTANT IN THE PROCESS OF FINDING THE PARTNER FOR YOU.
If anyone has ever asked you 'What is your attachment style ?' , and your immediate response was either “good” or “what's that?”, this article is for you.
Background: What Attachment style is defined today really came about through the work of many Scientists and Psychologist, all of them have contributed to the a true understanding of how humans – from cradle to grave, “attach”.
The attachment theory was first explored and studied by John Bowlby (1907 - 1990), a British psychoanalyst who wanted to understand the intense distress experienced by infants who had been separated from their parents.
Mary Ainsworth (1913 – 1999),explored Bowlby’s ideas and sought to take it a step further. Her study within the ‘Strange Situation’ Lab study of 12 month old infants produced the distinction of 3 attachment styles – Anxious, Avoidant, Secure.
Hazan and Shaver (1987) were two of the first researchers to explore Bowlby's ideas in the context of romantic relationships. Hazan and Shaver noted that the relationship between infants and caregivers share commonalities with the relationship between adult romantic partners
In the book 'Attached', Psychiatrist and Neuroscientist Dr. Amir Levine and Rachel Heller reveal how an understanding of adult attachment can help us find and sustain love.
Consider this: Many times, the way we respond in certain situations within a romantic relationship comes directly from our core attachment style. Understanding this will allow us to pause and reflect the root of where our emotion is coming from. This will contribute to ensuring that we leave or remain in the right relationships.
Don’t reward bad behaviour (distant and non committal) because your anxious attachment style is out in full force.
Tell me more: Check out the book 'Attached', Levine and Heller guide readers in determining what attachment style they are, offering a road map for building stronger, more fulfilling connections with the people they love.
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